Friday, April 10, 2009

Hippity Hoppity, All The Way Down The Damn Green Bean Trail....


Okay..... deep breath here....

But you know, sometimes I reach the point where I just want to stand on my rooftop and scream out to the cosmos....

I want to scream out the universal, never ending, quintessential, penultimate (and so forth) question...

I want to know, by God!

WHY, Lord, WHY?


I repeat--- why????

Why is it that for every single dang holiday family dinner I get ordered assigned to make the damn Green Bean Casserole?

Why can't I make something else for Easter Dinner?

Is this all because of that regrettable Cilantro Incident?

I mean, I've been assigned to make the stupid Green Bean Casserole for Blaine's family holiday dinners since 1993. Why can't I make something else? Would it tear a hole in the universe if I made the scalloped potatoes? Would it rend the fabric of the space/time continuum if I made the ham? Would it cause an international incident if I made the hot rolls? Would it worsen the national debt if I made the chocolate cake? Would it ruin political relations with Canada and Mexico if I made the marshmellowed yams?

Would it upset the ecology of the 2 million acres of Kansas wheat fields if I made the dadgum salad?

I ask you, WHY?


susan said...

I say make the green bean casserole, put it in a "ugly" dish. Then make whatever the hopity hop that you want and take it along too! That's what I would do. It's like when I have holidays at my sisters house, I know that I will be the one who will peel the potatoes...why? I am a cook by trade! Do they think I spend my day just peeling potatoes? So go for it and make something you want!


Anonymous said...


It's all in how you look at it. Maybe your green bean casserole is SOOOOO yummy. Maybe your's is the only one with a good ratio of bean to onion. Maybe someone else made it before you and it was burnt, but then you came along and now its PERFECT!

I know that every Thanksgiving I look forward to my Aunt Mary's sweet potatoes, and if anyone else made them, it just wouldnt be the same, and my Thanksgiving would be utterly ruined. Just like my dad is a KILLER stuffing maker, and my brother is the MASTER of the gravy.

But, I say that at the end of the meal, when everyone is sitting on the couch and unbuttoning their pants and groaning, you could say something like "you know what was missing? *enter-dish-here*!!!! Maybe next year I'll bring that!!!"

Happy easter!
*going back into lurk mode*

Kim said...

I make that every Christmas. I don't get what is so great about it, but the family starts raving about it a month in advance.

So, I make it.


Alabamama said...

Ok Bo, time to re-invent this dish...what happens if you use fresh, uncut green beans, steamed lightly, drizzled with a wonderful creamy homemade sauce, topped with crispy real onion rings? Now THAT's a dish any bunny can get excited about....

Lia Nord said...

I'll bet they have no idea you hate making it! But I'll also bet that you make it "just right" as a previous commenter said. Some families are funny--I went to someone's house for Thanksgiving and asked what I could bring, and they told me "nothing"--each person brings what they've made for years and years, and someone else's version "just wouldn't taste right." (I think I eventually brought wine.) So I'm sure it's a compliment to your green bean casserole.

In my childhood I would have choked and gagged over bean casserole--mushrooms and onions (even French Fried ones) were poison to me--but now I miss it! No cream of mushroom soup in Germany! No French Fried Onions! (outside of an army base, I guess). I don't know when I discovered the joy of green bean casserole, but I do love it now (just not too often).

I do love your "ugly" wrap! Definitely unique. You may start a new fashion!

Ginger said...

When I saw the ingredients, and before I read the rant, uh, I mean blog. I was about to say, Yum. I like green bean casserole!