Sunday, April 11, 2010

The Davy Crockett of.....well....petunias...




I hear your voice,

it's like an angel sighing,

I have no choice,

I hear your voice,

Feels like flying....

("Like a Prayer", Madonna)


Whenever things start changing---and I hate change with a purple passion---I get very melancholy and sad.

One of the things which is changing are the seasons.....

Sensing that planting time is nigh, I dragged my stupid self out to the back deck and began the necessary preparations to put together and plant all the things Blaine had bought me for a nice little deck garden. It had all started with me wanting to try out that "Topsy Turvy" upside-down tomato planter doohickey I keep seeing on TV. And so I asked Blaine to buy me one. While he was buying the Topsy Turvey thing (and a "large-size cherry tomato" plant to put into it) he also picked up four kitchen herbs: mint, oregano, sweet basil, and coriander/cilantro. The little plants look somewhat bedraggled but I think it's just shell-shock from being transplanted. I'm not worried. I have an amazing green thumb---and I talk to my plants. I can make anything grow.

The only time I ever had bad luck with plants was a garden bug trauma which occurred when I was still living in Texas--- "The Great Petunia Massacre of 2002" ---let's not speak of it!

("The Great Petunia Massacre of 2002" was to my petunias as The Alamo is to Texans...)

(Remember the Alamo!!)

(Remember The Petunias!.....)

Okay, another major change which has me swooning around like a forlorn waif is the huge change which is about to happen in my therapy.

The powers-that-be have decided to transfer me to a year-long program of DBT, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, meant for patients who don't respond to conventional therapy--- and it's in a completely different building than the one I've been going to for 2 years. And worse yet, it is comprised of a group of completely different 1:1 therapists---which means I will lose my therapist, Fred!

(A year-long program??? Son of a bitch.... I've got THAT MANY bats in the belfry??)

But it's losing Fred that has me the saddest.

But both Fred and my case manager claim that I need the above-mentioned type of therapy. They said it's an "exclusive" group for a certain type of patient, and that it's "intense". They also said that you work closer with your therapist--- closer even than I have in the past with Fred. And that's the part I hate---losing Fred. Because although I will keep my same psychiatrist for the prescription of my meds, I will have a different 1:1 therapist than Fred. I'll have one of the therapists tied to that DBT group, a guy who specializes in DBT---and a guy my case manager claims is "just as excellent as Fred".

But the instant he said that, I thought in my head: "NOBODY is as excellent as Fred"!!

What will I do without Fred?

Remember the Petunias!......

Where was I?

Oh yes---planting a deck garden.

I planted three pitiful looking snap bean seedlings in a pot and stuck two metal stakes next to them for the young vines to climb up while they're growing long enough to vine themselves around the deck's railings. I told Blaine that these three little plants will NOT be enough to have a nice crop of snap beans, so he is currently making a second trip to the store to get more. I told him to get me two big planters and a packet of snap bean seeds.

Yes, the season is changing...

My therapy is changing....

And the idiot cats couldn't care less. They either sleep.....

Or they squabble.... about whatever it is that cats squabble about....

Remember the Petunias!....



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