Wednesday, March 03, 2010

Was That the Big Bad Wolf I Heard? Naaah, it was just Blaine (who sometimes acts like the Big Bad Wolf but let's not go there....)

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Once upon a time, there was a crazy little girl traipsing up and down the Yellow Brick Road in Overland Park, Kansas....

The crazy little girl's name was Little Red Riding Hood. One day, Red Riding Hood's mother instructed her to take a basket of goodies to her elderly Grandmother, who lives in the forest called Olathe.

The problem was, the crazy little girl's hoodie had worn itself out to rags and so she decided that she needed a new hoodie. And furthermore, she decided to knit one for herself. So she embarked on the project, a rather bizarre, bright cherry-red garment she called "The Little Red Riding Hoodie".

(You can click on the picture to see it enlarged, with a better view of the details---especially those damn annoying popcorn balls--- and the "clusters", which Red Riding Hood knows are really just small popcorn balls....)

It turned out to be a very frustrating garment to knit. And that is because Red Riding Hood was doing her usual nonsense, which means that she is knitting it by the seat of her pants, designing the pattern as she goes along.

This requires many Post-It notes. And sometimes it requires frogging---MUCH frogging--- which causes many cuss words to be emitted from crazy Little Red Riding Hood. And also, the garment will require a lot of duplicate stitch embroidery to be done at the end.

You see, Little Red Riding Hood has a picture of how she wants the hoodie to turn out in her head----but getting it out of her crazy little brain and down to the actual, in-progress hoodie is not as easy as Red Riding Hood had first thought...

(And she has a totally NEAT idea for the sleeves!! And the edging! And the hood!.....and well, you know.)

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82 comments:

Cindy/KS said...

Looks interestinger & interestinger! Can't wait to see it all worked out!

Me - I'm just plugging away at my newest & most favorite so so far! Paton's Stretch Socks in Mineral (blue, rust, grey) with a spiral design on it. About 2 inches from doing the heel!

Anonymous said...

I think that sweater "thing" is way too busy, too much stuff going on there in fact I don't like much of the stuff you post, maybe you should switch to something easier than designing knitwear.
just saying...

Bo... said...

To Anonymous above: I think you're just green with envy. What's the matter? Are you one of those people who isn't capable of "designing"? I ave been selling my designs under a different name for years. And I have another project coming out soon which I am going to sell. I'll let you know when it comes off the drawing board.

And oh yes: fuck off.

HAH!

Anonymous said...

if you are such a famous designer why do you hide?

Bo... said...

Shut the fuck up. And if you didn't read it right the first time, I said: "S.H.U.T. T.H.E. F.U.C.K. U.P.

Anonymous said...

you are wayyyyyyyy to easy to bait

Anonymous said...

HIDEOUS. Stop now!

Anonymous said...

god doesn't like little girls who type swear words on the internet

Bo... said...

You've got it wrong, dumbass. I toy with people like you. And let me guess: you are a sadly angry and bitter person who has nothing better to do than attempt to piss people like me off. And the saddest part of it is.....you don't piss us off. We laugh you off like yesterday's biscuits.

Bo... said...

Sorry idiots, but I'm tired and am going to beddie-byes. If you'd like to insult me further, catch me tomorrow when I'm bored. Night night.

Bo... said...

Oh yes, I forgot to say: Why don't you go back to your alter of worship, that idiot to our north, and haunt her blog? But if you do so, you had better make your comment "green", crunchy granola, politically correct, and totally worshipful of her or she won't print it.

And again, night night.....

danielle said...

GORGEOUS-er and GORGEOUS-er!

danielle said...

Hey - Anonymous - if you dont like much of what Bo posts - why the heck are you wasting your time reading and looking at it?????????????????????????????????

kg said...

I'm liking this and can't wait to see the rest!

Anonymous said...

I'm curious as to how your hoodie is going to turn out. I hope you post a picture of yourself modeling the finished hoodie so we can all see it. :)

Bo... said...

Thanks you guys for your support. And thank you, Danielle, for showing the weirdo just how ridiculous they look.

Anonymous said...

I love your style...eclectic, and refreshing! Nice work.

Terri

LesleyD said...

I think it's looking great! It's very intriguing!! I have problems designing simple/complex stuff on the seat of my pants too. Usually I'll sketch out an outline of the thing I'm trying to create and then TRY to plug in the stitches all on graph paper. I constantly change my mind on what/how I want stuff to look. Good luck and I can't wait to see the results!!! :-)

Anonymous said...

I read because I am in awe of her total weirdness and to see what she can possibly come up with next and our little alcohlic, top designer, nurse?, nut case,agorophobic, boot wearing,filthy mouthed, anti-Canadian, preacher of the gospel, living in la la land, who was so, so put upon as a child, never fails to amuse me

Anonymous said...

and her knitting is so B.A.D., it's hiarious

Anonymous said...

ya Bo I would LOVE to see a picture of you in your "hoodie"

Bo... said...

Thanks,you guys who are kind!

Bo... said...

And then to the Anonymous who called me no less than 10 rude names in their comment:

You forgot "low-down, dirty double-crossing, egg-sucking, Confederate ass"...

Bo... said...

To the Anonymous who said my knitting is bad: You misspelled "hilarious". You wrote "hiarius". I knew you insulting Anonymouses were ignorant. I'll bet you didn't graduate from high school.

Bo... said...

And to the Anonymous who keeps asking for a picture of me--what is your major malfunction? Do you have some sort of a crush on me? Well, two thing I need to tell you: one is that I prefer men. And two, I don't take orders from idiots like you. So I'm telling you for the last time that you'll never get a picture of me.

Anonymous said...

Yes. I may have made a typo
you are correct I MEANT hilarious!! as in laughing my ass off but at least I don't use poor English like "gooder"
daaaaaaaaaaaa ah ah ah

Bo... said...

Geez, Anonymous, I feel sorry for you. Is insulting people what you do on a daily basis? Do you get a kick out of it? The trick is, to find somebody who CARES! I don't care what you say. I don't care what your opinion of me is. And I totally don't care why you want to show yourself as being an idiot on my comments page. All my friends and I are laughing our asses off at you.

Anonymous said...

No one is jealous over anything about you. Except maybe your residing in delusional world where one could take a break from reality for a bit.
And perhaps you need to put friends in italics, you know, as if they were real as well.

mrslilypond said...

To the rude Anon: I understand that's Bo's sense of fashion is a little quirky. No offense to Bo, but pretty much I wouldn't wear half the things she makes, BUT it's her style. Who am I to judge, I've seen crazier looking things in fashion magazines and knitting/crochet books and magazines.
No one is asking you to like the stuff, no one is asking you to knit the stuff.
But you don't need to be insulting either.
Doesn't anyone have anything better to do these days than bash others?

Anonymous said...

I've never hated a fair isle flower more either...

Anonymous said...

Hi Bo
I have been sitting back reading all that is being written here trying to figure out what is going on?
I have read back the other persons blog and for the life of me I cannot see where she comes across as anti-American.
Would you please explain what the controversey is all about? What exactly was said that would have you so angry. What did we as Canadians do?

dmc

Bo... said...

You said: "No one is jealous of you..."

Au contraire---you guys are OBSESSED with me! And that's the truth---you are so obsessed with me that we actually bought an alarm system for our house.

Because we just can't believe how deranged you are.

Bo... said...

Thanks a million, Mrs.LilliPond!! That was always my point exactly. If somebody doesn't like my blog, don't read it! And if somebody doesn't like the things I knit, then don't look at them!

Bo... said...

To the post signed as dmc , I will tell you what happened. And you will no doubt think I'm nuts, like the rest of these haters.

It was the day before the Canadian 4th of July and also the American 4th of July. And YH wrote a blog post which that had some sentences in there which softly ridiculed America or American heroes. You should go back and read it. But, you will probably not see it as being anti-American.

I looked back in her history and saw that she's done that before on Canada's 4th of July.

And mind you, I don't mind somebody having anti-American sentiments when they don't make money in this country, but she makes approx. 75-80% of her book sales in this country. THAT bugged me.

I mulled it about in my head, and then I started getting a parade of emails which supported me. Some of them even said that this same issue was why they had stopped reading YH's blog. So....I KNEW I wasn't crazy thinking that.

So I wrote several things on several blog posts detailing exactly how I was angry at YH for her anti-Americanism.

I've earned the right to hate anti-Americanism. I was overseas, working at the US Embassy in Damascus, Syria in 1997----and a mob attempted to storm the embassy. They burnt our flag in the street and attempted to gain entry into the Embassy's grounds. It took around 121 cans of tear gas to repel them over a 6-hour orderal. And MY MOTHER WAS IN THERE!! I was facing the fact that we all could very well die there. Those of us who hadn't registered a will with the Embassy were ordered to make our wills and phone them home. Which I did.

At the last minute, when the mobs had almost gained access to the back of the Embassy's compound, and our small contingent of marines (5) knew that the gates would hold for only too long, began handing out guns to anybody with military experience and/or knew how to handle a gun. But the Syrian dictator finally ordered riot troops to save us. And they did.

I lived overseas all my life. And most the of Canadians we encountered made sport of ridiculing us Americans.

And I was deprived of living in my country, due to my parents jobs of traveling the globe, and so I hungered for my country. I wanted to go back there so.

But I don't hate Canadians. But I don't appreciate those Canadians who make subtle anti-American jokes, and the fact that they are always making remarks that elevate them while making subtle anti-American remarks.

There you have it.

1:22 PM

Anonymous said...

Hey again Bo
I am truly sorry that you went through that ordeal in Syria, I can well imagine how frightening that must have been.
However I don't see how that relates to Canadians, it wasn't us who stormed the embassy. In fact I believe Canada is one of the best allies the US has ever had, we are right there with you in Afghanistan (but that's a different story. We are know world wide as Peacekeepers.
As for the blog post including anti-Americanism (and I hate writing that) I think if anything was said, it was likely a good natured ribbing, just look at the way we poked fun at ourselves at the closing ceremonies for the Olympics.
I am sorry that you feel the way you do and as a Canadian I want you to know that I'm glad "you're there" and read with interest your blog and others. It's the knittin' that it's all about, we all share the common joy of the need;les and yarn
keep posting
dmc

Bo... said...

Thank you, dmc.

And I promise you that I don't feel negatively towards the country of Canada as a whole and also its peoples. I just don't like the ones who have (in my opinion) expressed negatively against my country. AS a matter of fact, I love Canadians---they were the ones who saved many of our Embassy employees when the students overthrew the govt. in Iran, in '79--- and attacked the Embassy and took hostages.

Anonymous said...

please excuse my poor typing skills!
d

Bo... said...

d---your typing skills are just fine. I make a lot of mistakes and have to rely on Spell Check.

Anonymous said...

and by the way I think your little boots are quite springy AND I am amazed at you LRR hoodie, what a lot of work in that!
your friend
dmc

Bo... said...

Thanks, dmc!!

Anonymous said...

Bo, please--it's NOT 'our 4th of July'. Canada Day celebrates the anniversary of the 1 July 1867 enactment of the British North America Act. It's not the same thing at all. Is it difficult for you to say 'Canada Day'?

Bo... said...

To Anonymous: I am sincerely sorry that I got it wrong. I remember seeing some comment talking about Canada's 4th of July and so I guess I just figured that's what it was. I really am sorry---because believe it or not, I am NOT anti-Canadian. Although I had bad experiences overseas, I do not equate the behavior of one person to their whole population. But geez oh man, after I had that tangle with a certain person up north, I began getting daily doses of anti-Bo stuff. I have had to endure many anti-Bo stuff where the insults hurled at me---and most of them don't know what they're talking about. For instance, I was called a stalker and that YH should notify Homeland Security. How ridiculous! I haven't a violent bone in my body. And getting into an argument is not an international incident, you know? But even since those occurrences, I still have the utmost respect for Canada. I have even asked Blaine if, for our next cruise, we could go on one up the coast of Canada. I've been told it's breathtakingly beautiful.

So yes, I can say "Canada Day". And I did cheer for the Canadian athletes who won medals. I love my northern neighbors, just as I love our southern neighbor, Mexico. In fact, I speak Spanish and was always asked to interpret for patients in whatever hospital I worked at.

So I wish to high hell that the rumormongers would get it right. I am NOT prejudiced against Canada. I just don't like certain Canadians, as I don't like some Americans.

Can you possibly understand that?

Anonymous said...

Thanks, Bo for your apology regarding 'Canada Day'. I appreciate that.

I'm Canadian but I've lived in the USA for a long time. I do read YH's blog and enjoy it. I don't think that she is anti American. Sometimes I read something she wrote and think 'Oh-Oh some Americans are not going to understand that.' I know that what she said is pro Canadian and not anti American but it might not sound that way to some. Canadians are passionate about their country just as Americans are passionate about the theirs. So if a Canadian says I love the way something is in Canada it doesn't mean they don't like the way it is in the US. They just love the way Canada does it. That's all.

Jenny

Bo... said...

And thank you, Jenny---your kind words mean a lot to me.

Anonymous said...

I read the YH blog and I think that she is just adorable. I also saw the sweater she knitted for the Knitting Olympics and her sweater turned out beautifully. I hope you got a chance to see it; she did a wonderful job.

Bo... said...

Yes, Anonymous, I saw her dang sweater---but it looks too small on her---and the sleeves are too short. It looks exactly like what it was---a rush job. I can't believe somebody would do such a poor job of a fabulous Dale of Norway sweater simply for the sake of winning a knitting race. What a shame.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, your comment was interesting. I think her sweater fit her beautifully and I could also see her joy over her completed project.

Perhaps you will consider joining the Knitting Olympics next time; I would like to see what project you would select. Be happy.

Bo... said...

Thank you, and I am happy. But about the sweater issue. A Dale of Norway garment should never be rushed. If done with care, in the right gauge and right size, it is stunningly beautiful. But when done in a hurry, like hers, it is ruined and nothing like the glory which is emitted from a beautifully done Dale of Norway pattern. But hers was done in a hurry, with substitutions of color. And to add insult to injury, hers was done in a hurry. It doesn't fit and the sleeves are too short. And she knows it. This is actually the first time I've ever seen somebody ruin a Dale of Norway pattern.

Bo... said...

Oh, and I forgot to add: I would never join the knitting Olympics because I would never knit something in a hurry, and risk the same ruinous result as she did.

Anonymous said...

There's some really rude comments on this post you should really delete....oh wait, that's you.

Bo... said...

Yawn.....

Anonymous said...

Well my dear, do finish your project so we can all see the beauty of your handiwork....

Anonymous said...

Look up "delusional" in the dictionary. There's a picture of you. Especially where your godawful knitting is concerned.

Bo... said...

LOL LOL LOL!!!! You really cracked me up with that one! LOL LOL LOL!!!

Anonymous said...

I saw nothing wrong with the way she completed the sweater. I think it's beautiful and I understand why she would shorten the sleeves; I almost always have to shorten sweater arms for myself. Besides, who HASN'T made a color substitution when working on someone else's patterns?

You know, it's not nice to say such ugly things about someone else's projects. Besides, how do you feel when someone criticizes your work?

Anonymous said...

Bo, I've never commented here before but I feel this time that I must. First, I want to introduce myself as a proud American with a veteran husband. I came to you through your interactions with YH, who I've been reading for years. I've stayed with you because your knitting is so very interesting, but I don't visit your blog often any longer, and I've taken you off my Twitter feed because of all the negativity. I want to tell you that I LOVE your hoodie, I think it is amazing. I also love YHs Dale. Substituting a color doesn't take away from the pattern and sleeve length is a personal choice (my mom used to insist her pants end at the top of her ankle bone, and though it would drive me nuts, it was her preference and I respected that). So to sum up, I wish you peace and happiness. I will occasionally come back to see how you're doing. Less nagativity will reward you, and as you've said in the past, if you don't like something, stop reading it. I would make just that small suggestion to you. Sincerely, Rachel in CA

Bo... said...

Hey, I'm entitled to my opinion. And I do believe I have enough knitting experience to know when something was knitted in a rush.

There is something fantastically beautiful about a Dale of Norway design. They are so beautiful that people have been known to stop and stare when they see one.

But I'm sorry---this one doesn't have that ethereal beauty. It looks ordinary. And it looks ordinary because the colors don't have enough contrast, nor does the garment fit well. And the sleeves are too short--and Dale of Norway garments are usually not knitted with too-short sleeves.

Sorry but that's my opinion. And I'm entitled to my opinion. Somebody asked for it---and so I gave it. Had they not asked for it, I wouldn't have given it.

And as for the person who says she's not going to follow my Twitter anymore---that's your right and I will miss you. But that's your choice. You gave your reasons and said you'll check in with me every now and then---and I hope you do. And I hope you leave me a comment telling me that you stopped in and how you're doing.

mrslilypond said...

now when you say too short sleeves, do you mean too short according to the pattern or too short on the person wearing the sweater?

Because I've seen the pics and the sleeves don't look too short on her. And I can understand altering them in order to fit, I'm a short person and hate sleeves that are too long because they get filthy, no matter how clean I am. That's no way to treat a garment. Especially a hand made one. Plus she only substituted the yellow the rest of the colors were not. . Beautiful, no, but I don't like Dale of Norway sweaters, much too busy for my taste. Beautifully made, yes.

I've defended you in the past as you know, but in this instance I think your dislike is coloring your view of the sweater.

Bo... said...

Thank you Mrs. Lilipond for your honesty and the polite way you stated it. I totally respect that. In a couple of weeks I, too, will unveil a sweater, one which I designed myself--- which puts me in a very vulnerable potition, especially since I'm having a lot of trouble with it. And so I expect that turnabout will be fair play--- and I will have to take a LOT of criticism from those who don't like me or my creations. (In fact, some have already started criticizing it and I haven't even finished the body yet...) And I'll print all the negative comments here. (As a matter of fact, have no fear---I usually pay in spades whenever I've....uh....done certain things that are unpopular...)

Bo... said...

Oh yes Mrs. Lilipond----you could be right.

Anonymous said...

I'd like to see it 'on.'

Judi Seal said...

This is just insanely gorgeous!

knittingmama said...

All I have to say is, "WOW!" You are doing some amazing work. I can't wait to see where it goes from here.

Bo... said...

Thank you, Knitting Mama. You totally brightened my day!

Bo... said...

To Anonymous above who wants to "see it on".

Sigh....and Good Lord, but what is this total FASCINATION you guys have with seeing me? Shit, you're driving me NUTS with this.

I do have a newspaper clipping picture of me as a cheerleader in college. That was the year that I won "California Cheerleader of the Year". That was a good year. I cut the pic of the girl next to me out because she stole one of my boyfriends. (Her karma struck because he dumped HER a couple of weeks later.)

(He was a snare drummer in the college's marching band.)

Anyway here's the link:
http://bohemianknitter.blogspot.com/2009/11/bos-haute-psychedelic-couture.html

Just imagine me a little older.

Bo... said...

It's in the "Bo's Haute Couture" blogpost in case that link doesn't work right.

Bo... said...

Thank you, Judi!!!

Anonymous said...

I highly doubt that pic is you!

Bo... said...

To Anonymous above:

Ummmm...guess what?

I couldn't care less if you think the pic is me or not!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

for one thing, your legs are wayyy too short.........

Anonymous said...

How are we to know if your sweaters have a good fit, if the sleeves are the right length, if they're not too small if you never give us a picture of you modeling them? I suspect you like everything to fit way too big instead of just right, but we'll never know if there's never a picture of you in them.

Bo... said...

To the two Anonymouses above that are STILL asking for my picture (and to my friends---close your ears):

Why don't you just fuck off? What happened---did you get thrown out of YH's blog? HEH!

Anonymous said...

not likely.....

Anonymous said...

as soon as someone mentions "seeing " you
or a pic of you in your sweaters
you start telling everyone to fuck off
which leads one to believe that you are rather bizarre looking or something is terribly out of whack and you never answer "why so shy?" just a fuck off, I've always believed that when someone has nothing intelligent to say, then the cursing come out...just saying...

Anonymous said...

if Bo doesn't want to frighten people anymore than with just her knitting, we should respect that!

Anonymous said...

My bet is that Bo is as big as a house and nothing fits across her ginormous ass.

Bo... said...

To the three idiots above:

LOL! Don't you chuckleheads just WISH I was ugly, heh! Guess I won't elaborate on the years I did some modeling since you couldn't handle my cheerleading pic!

(snicker, snicker, snort!)

Anonymous said...

I totally understand not wanting a bunch of strangers looking at photos of you ,especially since a lot of nasty people are drawn to you (stop responding to them already... it just eggs them on).

But, I understand why your readers want to see the sweater "on".
It is easier to see fit, drape, scale, etc.

Have you considered shots that don't show your face (like Brooklyntweed's photos) or perhaps getting someone else to model it?

Lora

Bo... said...

For the record:

1. The older lady in the black fuzzy hat in the boat is my MOTHER. Leave her alone.

2. For the last time, I don't give a shit WHAT logic you use, I refuse to put a picture of myself up---simply because you are all assholes and want it. That way, I have CONTROL of my blog---NOT YOU.

3. You guys are the internet equivvalent of thugs.

4. You don't bother me in the least.

5. Oh yeah, and did I say fuck off again? If not, fuck off.

Anonymous said...

WHAT??
Bo... you totally misunderstood me. I was only making a helpful suggestion so you could properly show off your sweater without having to post pics that would reveal your identity. Personally I was curious about how the bottom bit sits (at the waist, hips etc)
Not to be rude, but I'm not actually the internet equivilant of a peeping tom, and I'm not interested in getting a peek at you, or in trying to force you to do anything.

If you read my whole comment you would have seen my other suggestion that you have someone else model the sweater for you.

I am NOT one of your harrasing anonymouses, I only started commenting on your blog yesterday, and chose "anonymous" because I don't have a google account or blog.

I gave my name though... and used my manners. I haven't ever criticized your Mother(and why would I?), am not in any possible way a thug, or an asshole, and I have to say I don't appreciate you telling me to fuck off!


That's a pretty shabby way to treat a friendly reader for leaving a simple, reasonable comment, don't you think?


Respond if you like, or not. I've told you how I feel.

With manners,
Lora

Bo... said...

Lora, I am truly sorry. I was somewhat paranoid that day---especially since there's been a lot of times where somebody was nice....but I perceived it as sarcasm. And I didn't realize that they weren't trying to be insulting until the person wrote back and explained that they weren't being sarcastic. And with all those Anonymouses wanting me to put up a pic of myself for the wrong reasons (they just wanted another avenue to criticize me), I probably confused your comment with that group's intentions. I can't bring a comment back once I've deleted it, but please accept my apologies---I am truly sorry. Anyway, it's going to be awhile till I finish this sweater and maybe when I do I'll see about putting it on for a pic. Once again, I'm very sorry I deleted your comment.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the apology.
No worries...
we all get the wrong end of the stick (weird canadian hockey slang for making an error) sometimes.

Lora