Thursday, July 12, 2007

End of Part One...

Ahem?

I said, Ahem, ladies and gentlemen?

This is your Message Goat speaking. I have an announcement to make regarding The Bohemian Road Nurse.

I will not mince words here and will state it simply:

Unfortunately, to her everlasting shame, Bo drank alcohol again--- for a ten day period of time.

Bo almost died this time. When she was taken to the Emergency Room, she was in shock, her blood pressure being 53/22. The doctors did not think she was going to make it. And thus, Belinda frantically found Bo's sister's number in her cell phone and called to notify the family.

Later, Bo's sister called back and stated that neither Bo's mother nor sister were concerned and would not be coming to the hospital. They stated: "Bo has done this before and we're tired of it."

But Bo did surprise the doctors by fighting to live--- and live she did. And after that, Bo's best friends in the whole world, Belinda and Bonnie, drove Bo to a treatment center to recover more fully.

I am told that, although weakened severely, Bo has stated that it is her intention to rise from the ashes and continue her battle with this terrible disease, a disease she has fought for so long in tandem with the depression which plagues her. She stated that she has "no idea why God allowed her to live" but that she is determined to find out.

Thus, Part One of Tales of the Bohemian Road Nurse has ended.

I will notify you when Part Two begins.

(Also, all comments which have not yet been published WILL be published as soon as possible. )

That is all from Your Message Goat at this time.

33 comments:

Linda in Alameda, CA said...

Bo - Thank God you are alive, and back, more or less. I have missed your notes so much, and am looking forward to "sharing" in your recovery and return. Please never forget that there are many of us in cyber-land who care about you.
Hugs.

tk said...

Praying for you...
Missed you, glad you're back

Lin said...

Dear Bo,

I'm sorry for what has happened but proud of you for your determination to battle the diseases. They're awful. I know. But shame has no part in this. Should someone be ashamed of being a diabetic? Or dystrophic? Or a victim of any other disease? I don't think so, girl! So hold your head up and keep up the good fight. You are loved by many.

Thanks to Belinda and Bonnie and all the rest of your local supporters. We need more folks like them and you.

With love,

Lin

Alabamama said...

Ah, Phoenix. Yes, our wild flaming bird, you will rise again from the ashes. Better than ever because you'll remember the fire. Every time, it teaches us something. What did you need to learn, little one? There are many here who care about you. We watch you struggle and want to help. You're alive today. That's what matters. Your mission isn't over....heal.

Medblog Addict said...

Today I bought a dozen lemon madeleines from La Madeleine and thought about you. I am so glad that you are okay. You were missed.

Joan K said...

I've been worried about you Bo. Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you. You are a special person, loved by many of those who read your blog.

I've lived through a lot myself, including abuse. If Bo would like it I would be happy to send a book that has helped me through some dark times.

If she would like it please let me know where to send it and I would be happy to send it.

Joan

Joan K said...

p.s. you don't need to publish my previous comment, just pass it on to Bo if you think it will help.

And of course the book offer still stands.

Joan K

pdwarrior said...

I too am very glad to see you're back. You will be in my prayers.

Beth in MN said...

I had a feeling this time that life had gotten to be "too much" again, but so glad to hear you're fighting like a trooper. I'm so glad your friends were there for you, and we'll all be here for you when you're ready for "part one"!

Sending love from MN!

Warrior Knitter said...

Prayin' and pullin' for you, Bo

gypsygrrl said...

keep fighting bo...
and feel all our strength and love surrounding you.

god has let you live, because he has SO MANY lives for you yet to touch. one of them has been mine...

you will continue to be in my prayers and thoughts... much love to you and also to your dear friends who can give you the up-close love and hugs we internets cannot.

Deacon Barry said...

I am so glad to hear from you. I've been clicking on your blog regularly, waiting for an update. Please do not feel ashamed or beat up on yourself for what happened. Depression is a horrible debilitating condition. Someone very close and dear to me suffers from it, so I know the pain and distress you must be feeling. Don't let anyone get onto you for drinking, they'll have to walk a mile in your shoes first before they have that right. And anyway, last I heard, beer was still legal in Texas, so you have done nothing to feel guilty about.
Just remember, you've got folks out here in internetland who are following your adventures, and we care about you - I've been reading the comments.

Gwen said...

I'm so glad you're fighting back. Shame?! No. It's a freaking disease, not a moral decision. Not an easy disease either. No course of antibiotics, however long, will take care of it.

poody said...

girl I emailed you with my email address,so email me already! I will come to you and give you lots of hugs and maybe a kick in the ass if you need that too. I am nothing if not accomadating!Hang in there and let me know if there is anything you need I mean it. You know a home health nurse has no qualms about driving to wherever it is she needs to be! Even if it means coming to Podunk!

T-Mom said...

Bo, I've been checking your blog every day, and I was getting so worried about you. I'm so relieved to hear from you, and I guess I'll just repeat what others have already said: be gentle with yourself--you have a disease, not bad morals or lack of willpower or any of that. You are very much cared about. And I'm so grateful you have Belinda and Bonnie to help you over this rocky patch. Take care of yourself.

POPT said...

Welcome back! I missed you and have been worried about you. Work your steps, girl and know I'm pulling for you.

lheiserman said...

Message Goat - Thanks for keeping us all updated. Tell Bo that she's in my prayers as well.

There but by the grace of God and sheer luck go some of the rest of us.

The fact is that she's taking on a LOT of stress and has given back to this world more than she will probably ever know.

And message goat, please let Bo know that we are sorry her sister and mother may be sick of it, but we will always be there.

We know that she didn't pick an easy career, but instead chose to battle for others, so let her know, message goat, we love her and send some of those stupid cows. You see I would be there for every cow she sees, there are have been prayers for her.

Cyndy said...

Well, I have never been more gladdened to be addressed by a goat. And not just any goat; Bo's message goat. The most important one that there is.

It's not surprising that Bo struggled so with the events of late. It's her enormous capacity for caring that brought her to that place. And that enormous wellspring will help her now.

I know Bo will keep fighting the good fight; As has been said, there are many more lives to be touched.

Thank you to everybody for caring; Bo knows there is a raft of love to help keep her afloat when things get tough.

And love and thanks to the goat. <3

net said...

((((Bo))))

Please don't be too hard on yourself.

Mama Mia said...

Oh Bo. {{{hugs}}}. I could tell by your last post that you were in dreadful emotional pain, and I'm sure that contributed to this, but I have no doubt that the message goat is entirely correct and that you will indeed be able to rise from the ashes. You are in my thoughts...

Susie said...

Believe it or not, God's still in control. There's a reason you've made it through and by His grace, somewhere down this road you'll be in a position to help others who've gone through the same thing.

Blessings~

Not Nurse Ratched said...

I was worried that no posts were showing up after that last one. Well, relapse is good for the soul if you live through it: no matter how far down we have gone, and all that. Thanks to the message goat for updates, and this fellow recovering drunk has Bo in her prayers fersure.

mielikki said...

thoughts and prayers with you. Stay strong, and FIGHT!

Taueret said...

Missed you, you have been through an awful time lately. Please keep fighting, you are so worth it.

may said...

warm thoughts going your way BO!

Psyche said...

Bo, I am so glad that you lived! Starting over is never easy even with only depression to deal with. You did not ask to get alcoholism, and there's nothing to be ashamed of. It's just an illness, like depression or asthma. You are in my thoughts and prayers while you start putting the pieces of your life back together in rehab.

God bless you and keep you.

Cinder said...

Oh my goodness Bo! I'm so glad you made it. Whether you realize it or not you are an incredibly strong person and your time on earth is not finished yet. Please don't feel ashamed,you have a disease. I've been fighting depression myself and know it's wicked hard .My family has grown tired of my struggles and well,phoeey(sp?) on them. They have no idea what we go through as nurses.We make new friends and they are our family.
Be gentle with yourself Bo and heal. {{{hugs}}}

Knitting Rose said...

You are in my thoughts and prayers. I am glad you are continuing to fight to live. the struggle against the demons you are wrestling is tough - but you can prevail. I am sorry about your mom & sis, but having a sister who is in rehab for the 5th or 6th time - I understand their skepticism. They love you - they are just having to deal with the same pain again. There are lots of cyber-people who love you and you are in a LOT of prayers.

Cate K said...

No shame. Sadness and frustration, yes. Like others have said, depression and alcoholism are diseases. I hope you go forth and complete at least a 28 day program and do follow-up care with 90 meetings in 90 days. For years my own kin turned their backs on me. I found a new family in the rooms. There is a reason you survived this, I know there is a reason that I survived so far... with luck, I'll know what that reason is when my great-grandchildren come to visit me in a nursing home someday.

aj said...

Message Goat, Belinda, and Bonnie, thank you for being there and finally breaking the silence.

Bo, my first husband was an alkie who was at the DT stage when I finally left, after he broke my jaw. However, I kept checking back on him, and eventually found him passed out with blood/vomit all around. Called his AA sponsor who got him commited to inpatient treatment. He dried out and stayed sober till he died (34 years). Per the facility, he would have died if we hadn't acted.

Both current husband and I have trouble with depression, and both of us like alcohol - so we stay away - we know the signs and have avoided the disease.

And yes, both depression and alcoholism are diseases, and both require a lot more guts and stubborness to deal with than a lot of other diseases. We are still pulling for you.

Can also understand your mother's and sister's position - they need to protect themselves. I still cared about first husband, but we were divorced by that point, and I could not get together with him again and survive myself.

Please try and survive. E-hugs, aj

Lisa said...

Bo, you have been missed by all. We are all painfully aware of how hard life can be and that the first step to recovery from any addiction is to admit it. You are a wonderful woman with a kind heart. We will all be hear waiting for you and cheering on your successes. We will also be here for you when you are down, so just let us know when you need us.

Special thanks to Belinda and Bonnie!

girlvet said...

Hang in there. You are a great person.

Jen said...

Bo, congratulations on getting treatment--I'm very proud of you. It takes a lot of strength to say, "I need help," but I know you're strong enough to make it through this relapse. I hope rehab is helpful for you.

*hugs*